Well here we are one week down and one more week to go. Ryan and I are patiently getting through the days, he is probably being more patient then I am. You would think work would be a good distraction but its not. Im on restriction from crossift so I can't even use that to take my mind off of things. I don't do well not being able to exercise and although we are walking every night, it just doesn't cut it. Im feeling all the lovely side effects of the progesterone and just don't feel like myself. My body has gone through changes from the hormones and the lack of exercise doesn't help. People may roll their eyes when I complain about how my body has already changed and yes if we are pregnant my body will change even more. As women you sacrifice your body in order to carry a child and yes it is beautiful and amazing but it also is a sacrifice, things just aren't the same after you give birth, at least I am told. Going through IVF the first time it took many months afterwards to feel like I got my body back to normal. Its hard knowing that once again I'm sacrificing my body for something that potentially may not work. Its not just my outer appearance that changes but its putting my body through months of feeling like crap. Hopefully this time the months of feeling like crap and the weight gain are setting me up for 9 months of carrying a baby or babies. Don't get me wrong if we are pregnant I will be happy as ever to see my body change for the biggest blessing in the world.
Im trying to stay as positive as I can and some days are better then others. Ive been tempted online looking at baby items but at the same time try not to just incase we don't get the outcome we want. Ryan has been awesome and truly believes in his heart that we are pregnant. I have had a few other people say the same thing to me so hopefully their feelings are correct. Its funny to hear people talk about how they are just as excited as us to find out if we are pregnant. Its a good feeling to know we have so many people supporting us and who truly want this for us. Ryan and I had a wonderful weekend together and enjoyed much needed time outside. Ryan even got in the tractor and got some field work done. I finished reading the book, The Magnolia Story, by Chip and Joanna Gaines. Ryan and I are big fans of them and their show Fixer Upper on HGTV. Their book talks about their story and how they came to their success. Their story is pretty amazing but what is even more amazing is their faith and how God worked in their life. They chose to let God lead their life and when they followed him their life became even greater then what they could have ever imagined and it has nothing to do with their success. Their story has really helped me look at my own life and how God has worked in my life. His plan for Ryan and I is even greater then we can imagine and we are choosing to follow him.
We are looking forward to spending time with family this weekend for Easter and really looking forward to next Monday. I get butterflies just thinking about it! Speaking of next Monday as we find out our news we will be waiting a couple days to share our news on the blog. We want to be able to process the results and share the news with our family and close friends first. So please be patient with us. We are holding onto faith that God will answer our prayers but know that whatever outcome we get that it will be God's will. Please continue the prayers for us and please take the time to reflect on this upcoming weekend. Ryan and I have started a tradition of reading through the bible each night the chapters leading up to Jesus's death and resurrection. He paid the biggest sacrifice and in return we get eternal life with him if we chose to follow him. There is no greater love then the love of God. Blessing to all of you on this Easter weekend.
Ryan and Lauren